Summer is the perfect time to go on long vacations and spend more time with your children. Since school is out, your kids have ample time to explore new activities and places. However, planning summer activities and vacations will not be easy for divorced couples.
If you and your ex-spouse share a co-parenting agreement, it might be a good idea to plan out a summer schedule beforehand to avoid conflict and confusion.
Below are a few tips that will help you work out a successful co-parenting plan for summer:
- Discuss Travel Plans With Your Ex-Spouse Before Summer
Planning a summer schedule is the key to avoiding conflict and confusion in a co-parenting arrangement. But that will only work if you discuss such plans and schedules with your ex-spouse.
As co-parents, you need to arrive at a middle ground. Your ex-spouse might also have vacation plans with the children, and you need to ensure these activities won’t overlap with yours. Both of you need to come up with a plan and then agree on the time you can each spend with the children.
- Establish a Summer Family Tradition
Planning and negotiating summer plans with an ex-spouse can get exhausting, especially if you make changes each year. Adjusting to new plans and schedules will only cause stress and conflict. It’s best to establish a summer tradition with your kids to keep things running smoothly. This also allows your family to have a sense of structure and consistency every summer. Examples of summer family traditions include weekend camping trips, going on road trips, visiting grandparents, and beach days.
Having a summer tradition will also reduce the anxiety of preparing for vacations. Since you already have a consistent schedule and set of activities, you and your kids can clear out those days ahead of time and pack the same essentials every year. Having a go-to summer tradition can also be cost-effective since you won’t have to purchase new supplies for each vacation.
- Keep Communication Lines Open
If you’re taking the kids on a week-long vacation or even a weekend camping trip, it’s important to keep an open line with the other parent. Keeping your ex-spouse in the loop about the day’s activities will help put their mind at ease. Additionally, it will show your children that their parents can still get along, even after the divorce.
Your kids should also maintain communication with the other parent throughout the trip. Your child might have needs that they’re not comfortable sharing or requesting from you. Your ex-spouse can act as a messenger who can nudge you to make necessary adjustments during your trip. Allowing your kids to have their own conversations with the other parent will make them feel more secure, especially when they’re away from home.
- Avoid Competing With Your Ex
Many divorced couples make the mistake of competing or trying to one-up each other, leading to increased animosity and frustration. Summer vacations are yet another avenue for such unhealthy competition.
For example, if one parent successfully went on a tropical getaway that the kids can’t stop talking about after arriving home, the other would try to beat that experience by going to Disney World. This leads to a never-ending cycle of one-upmanship and continual trips to ever more exciting destinations with no end in sight. In the long run, it will be expensive and result in your children having toxic views about parenting and relationships.
The most important thing during vacations is that you get to spend quality time with your children. Your children may be excited to go to new destinations or try out new activities. Still, the main goal is to bond, relax, and have fun together.
- Have Alternative Summer Plans
Many things could prevent you from following summer family traditions. There might be a death in the family that requires your children to travel and pay their respects, or your kids might be old enough to have their own plans for the summer. Or you may have to work extra hours at the office, meaning there is no time for a trip. Financial constraints might also cause you to cancel summer traditions. Additionally, your ex-spouse could also have a change of plans that would affect your scheduled summer vacations.
It’s prudent to anticipate these disruptions so you can make adjustments to your summer plans. Better yet, you must always have a Plan B. For example, if it’s impossible for you to go on a weekend camping trip this summer, you and the kids can visit an amusement park instead. You can make a list of nearby attractions that your kids will still enjoy going to during the summer. That way, you will always have something to look forward to, even if your summer vacation plan does not go as expected.
How to Prepare for Summer Vacations As a Co-Parent
Direct and open communication with your ex-spouse is the key to a smooth co-parenting plan during the summer. But remember, your kids are involved, too. To make sure their experience is fun, safe, and memorable, below are some major tips to take note of:
- Communicate With Your Children
Going camping might be your idea of a summer getaway, but your kids might have other plans in mind. They might be dreaming of amusement parks, beach vacations, and city sightseeing trips instead. To be sure, talk to them about your ideas and ask them what activities they prefer.
Your children might also want to attend summer camps or prefer to do ballet classes during the summer, so you have to take these personal considerations as well. In order to create a family vacation that will suit everyone’s needs and interests, it is important to take the time to discuss what each member wants.
- Sort Out Your Vacation Leaves Ahead of Time
As you make vacation plans with your children, don’t forget to make the proper arrangements at work, too. Plan your leaves as early as possible. If you anticipate emergencies, appoint a person to take care of the job while you’re away. Remember that your time with the children is divided with your ex-spouse, and you don’t want to miss out on every opportunity to spend quality time with them.
- Prepare for the Cost
Vacations can be expensive, especially if you have many kids to tag along with. So, if you’re planning a weekend getaway, make sure you can cover all the expenses. Consider the cost of food, accommodation, and transportation before you book anything.
Aside from that, your ex-spouse might need help in paying for summer classes and extracurricular activities that your children have decided to take during the summer. So, offer to pay a share of the cost for those activities too. If money is tight and you can’t afford to help out with such expenses, then look for creative ways to support your kids. You may offer to drive them home after their lessons or take them out to an ice cream shop in-between practices.
- Know What Your Children Should Pack
Packing could be stressful, especially if you’re not sure what your children will need during a long trip. For this, you might want to consult your ex and make a checklist. That way, you can both ensure that you have all the items your children will need for the journey.
As an added precaution, pack a first aid kit and sunscreen with you. Additionally, it’s a good idea to bring along some snacks, as well as books and other forms of entertainment for your children to enjoy during the trip.
Speak With a Family Law Attorney
If you’re anxious about making a co-parenting arrangement and need guidance on how best to approach the situation, consulting a family law attorney could be beneficial. Parenting is always a balancing act, and that act is understandably more difficult in a co-parenting arrangement. It is important to keep your children’s best interests in mind, and an experienced family law attorney can help you do just that.
A family law attorney can help you navigate the many complexities of parenting and ensure that both parents’ rights are respected. This helps you find an arrangement that works for all parties involved. Call The Law Office of Chad Zubi now to speak with an experienced family law attorney who can help create a successful co-parenting plan for the summer.
